The Back Porch
by rockpaperscissorslizardrock
Summary: So AU it's ridiculous. Callie's father's just passed away. She comes home to the suburbs from LA for the funeral with her fiance, Jackson. Her half siblings Izzy and Mark take the opportunity to drive her crazy. When she needs a break from it all, she finally finds someone who can relate on the back porch. I own absolutely nothing. But you know this. So does Shonda Rhimes.
1. Coming Home

**A/N: Hey guys! It's been a while. A long, long while and I figured why not try something new.**

Don't get me wrong.

I love to fly. There's a serenity in being airborne and that's not lost on me. But these long ass lines …the unnecessary guilt I feel at airport security…they're making me anxious. And I don't _get_ anxious. I get…ferocious. So this is new for me…this panic.

Jackson's the exact opposite, though. Everything's always been taken care of for him, so whatever I feel the need to freak out about, he confidently holds my hand through. And in return, when he needs to be knocked down a few pegs, I'm there with a hammer—metaphorically, of course. I guess that's why somewhere between high school and 26 he became my fiancé. Or maybe because right now, he happens to be the only person I can stand … he says it's the grief.

Either way, a sigh of relief escapes me at the sight of him. Except. He's returned with my brother… _Shit_. Mark had decided at the last minute to book the same flight as us. He and I shared our father's blood…and soon his funeral…I was hoping I could at least have this flight.

"Callie," He approaches with Styrofoam boxes in his hands – the food I'd been waiting for. His tone is _almost_ annoyed, which of course annoys me further.

"Mark," I growl.

"Thanks by the way," He says lifting a brow and taking the seat to my right.

"Oh fuck off, Mark. You said you weren't into taking a flight with us, so no, you didn't get a ride to the airport."

"Callie." Jackson takes the seat to my left. I shrug.

"Whatever. I'm here…you could've at least checked this morning." Mark mutters.

I respond with a second shrug.

In order to maintain my overall joy of flight, I realize this would be the best time to implement headphones, and it's not until 7 hours later that I take them off: after our boarding group had been called (for which I simply followed the boys) and after we'd found our seats (in which I let Mark take mine, so I could take his and sit alone). I honestly didn't think either of them noticed. But it was clear when Jackson approached me with his worried brows at baggage claim and gently caressed the buds out of my ears.

"Baby," he says in the same warning tone he'd said my actual name earlier, as if it sounded any better.

"Sweetheart," I say sarcastically. "I know how you and Mark get when you're together."

"How do we get?"

"Kinda stupid."

"That's 'cause you get like _this_, Callie."

"I don't get like anything, Jackson. It's fine. Mark needs it."

"But you need me," Jackson says lowly, taking my bag from my shoulder. Mark approaches and nods towards the exit.

"Gabby's picking us up." He says, passing me and Jackson. . He'd always been made uncomfortable by our tender moments.

"Gabby!? There are a thousand family members here and the _neighbor_ is picking us up?!"

'Gabby' may or may not have been a nickname that stuck based on how fucking much this girl could talk. We became friends because I rarely visited my dad, so I had the patience to be nice when I saw her. I no longer possess this patience. In my current state of state of being, I can NOT be held accountable for my actions.

Turns out, time had been good to Gabby. She pulled up and smiled; got out, hugged us each tightly and helped load bags into the car. Her driving was no longer erratic, her demeanor no longer manic (granted she was no longer an awkward pre-teen), nonetheless, she was the perfect blend of support and consolation.I sigh as we climb out of her car, genuinely sad to see the girl take off.

"I'll see you at the wake," she nods mournfully.

"She's a lot hotter," Mark comments before she's out of earshot.

I roll my eyes. Imagine…Gabby had been the solution as opposed to the problem itself. We'd grown up together…and at some point we were pretty close…but you know… in doses. Jackson takes my hand as we wait for someone to open the door to my father's house. I look up into his face and that soft smile eggs mine on. There I stood, smiling sadly as my sister thrusts the door open.

"Someone's happy… rather inappropriate, don't you think?"

My eyes shoot to hers. Izzy. Somehow she still reserves the right to be an adolescent bitch, though she's almost my age. An older gentleman shoos her away and invites us in. As I greet everyone around the house, I'm reminded of how exhausted I am…how I barely recognize these people anymore, and how I always forget what Jackson's looks do to other women.

It takes me so long to sneak out the back exit of the house; I'm gently convinced I'd forgotten where it was.

"Five minutes, " I sigh out loud, leaning a pair of open palms on the railing of the porch and dropping my head.

"I'd give it 20," a voice came from my right –along with the strong scent of a particular grade of marijuana; the earthy, sweet smelling kind. I inhale deeply without looking up.

"Want some?" the voice continues. My head snaps to my right angrily.

"I have to assume that someone in that house has informed you that my dad's dead?"

The person –woman—jumps a little, her eyes wide. I take the opportunity to go on,

"No?! No one told you?! Is Gabby there? She knows. For fuck's sake no, I don't wanna smoke weed with you…Jesus."

I decide to set a precedent for dramatics and storm **in.** Back in the house that is.

"Bitch," I mutter to no one in particular as I do so.

I know my grief probably looks more like an excuse to be an asshole…or like. turn into The Hulk. But I honestly hated them all. Now even my fiancé.

"Um, Callie, there are kids around…" some aunt says in passing, referring to my previous comment. Before I could lunge at her, Jackson appears and takes my hand.

"We're going for a drive," he says politely as we walk through the house and out the front door, someone hands him their keys and describes their car.

"Really?" I find myself huffing.

The soft pat of each car door shutting brought out a sigh as we drove around the block to the street we'd always reserved for making out when Jackson visited me at my dad's. It started off surprisingly similarly. He unbuckled his seatbelt and slid in closer, cupping my face with his hands. Before he pecked my lips lightly he whispered,

"You ok, Honey?"

"Everyone loves you so much, " I say between kisses "It's annoying."

Jackson burst out laughing mid-peck.

"It's not funny, Jackson. Be angry with me."

Embarrassingly enough, I was mostly serious…but his chuckles continued.

"You want me to _be angry_ with you?"

"No. Like, be angry like I am. Let's be angry together…stop being so damn likeable." I explain, as if it were rational. His endless chortling made a part of me clench. Yes, we continued kissing and petting, but I made no room for more. And soon, we were on our way to the house. Though he hadn't made much headway, Jackson smiled nonetheless; even held my hand. I knew if he was being honest, he'd admit he wanted nothing more than time alone with me. A chance to make me happy...and while this was clear to me…I can only acknowledge his adoration with something I soon recognize to be disgust.

Jackson smiles, "Everything alright?"

"Yeah. Why?" I respond curtly, trying to intercept the hateful thoughts that ring loudly in my head.

"Ok. No reason. Just your hand's doing weird stuff in mine."

I hum with a nod.

The sun was setting by the time we got back. The house had pockets of people in their pajamas talking solemnly with everyone else in bed. Strange that they'd go to bed this early, but then again, they'd eaten already, and in light of the wake at dawn…well there really wasn't much to talk about. After showering and changing our clothes, I thought I'd join Jackson in bed, but something told me he'd want to talk me to sleep. So I whispered something about tea and crept out back. He'd be knocked out In 5 minutes anyway.

The back porch overlooked acres of forest and a nearly hidden stream. I let my knees go out as I plop on the porch swing. I pull my legs to my chest and close my eyes, enjoying the familiar sting of East Coast winter on my cheeks. A neighboring porch door slams and one – then both – of my eyes spring open. The woman appears, but simply holds her cup of steaming something and walks to the edge of her own porch; staring directly ahead. I hadn't even realized I'd closed my eyes again when the woman spoke suddenly and startled them back open.

"I had to stop myself from asking if you're cold….that's how severely our previous encounter has traumatized me. I have to filter my own thoughts."

I roll my eyes with a smirk. Another moment passes and the woman looks back to see me staring at her with a furrowed brow.

"What?" She sips her drink.

"Who _are_ you?"

"Oh! I live here."

"Gabby didn't mention her parents moving out." I mumble.

The woman exhales slowly, "They died."

"Oh." I blink a few times, "my God."

"Few years back,"

I nod.

"I'm Arizona." The woman says. I flinch, then catch myself.

"Right. Gabby _would_ need a roommate."

"What was _that_?" Arizona smiles surreptitiously, obviously referring to my flinch.

"Nothing…I just…" I shake my head, "it's a um…"

She nods, goading me.

I begin talking with my hands. "_Arizona's_…not…what I was…"

"—Not a person name."

"No! that's …not." My gaze slides down as I trace my own hairline with an index finger, mortified.

"I'm named after a battleship…better?"

I look up and sigh.

Arizona laughs. "It's ok, it's ok. I'm just giving you shit…I get it all the time."

I shake my head. "I'm Callie, " I offer.

"You've got some nerve flinching at my name, Callie-fornia." A wide, dimpled smile comes my way.

"That's not what it's short for," I say shyly.

"I know, Calliope."

My jaw falls.

"What? You're not the only Callie in this—"

"Gabby told you."

"Gabby told me."

I laugh. ..so loudly I have to cover my mouth. I'm shaking on the porch swing.

"But I do know all about Calliope, the historical muse. I'm Greek you know."

I assess the thick blonde waves and blue eyes that light up even in this new darkness. Her complexion wasn't quite olive, but it was getting there…and seeing as it was November, I had to guess it wasn't a tan. Still….Greek?

"It's true," Arizona's smiling with her eyes closed.

I stifle another laugh, then sigh.

"Feels good, huh?" Arizona leans her elbows over the edge of her porch that faces mine.

"No," I shake my head, forlorn. "Laughing doesn't feel right."

"Feels right when you're scowling."

"When I'm mad. Yeah."

Arizona gives small knowing nods. We each sat on our porch swings in stark silence. So many hours pass that the last one left doesn't notice when the other has gone back inside.

**Please review!**


	2. A Wake

**This one's short...but who knows how I'll feel by the end of the weekend...I might be in the mood for another update ;)**

**Oh and thank you for your reviews, they keep me inspired.**

**/**

Wakes are kind of like weddings. Somewhere in the middle they share a sadness and a feigned joy. My father's was being held at a cemetery on top of some hill I'd never been to. There were a few tents and some men with rifles… I can vaguely recall his military past. Greenery was lush and at that time of the morning, a strong mist was still in the air. I smile at how much my dad would have hated this.

"Your father would've hated this, " Echoes a familiar voice behind me.

I whip around and embrace my mother tightly.

"Jesus Cal," She laughs.

"God Ma," is all I can muster.

When I finally pull away, we share a sad smile.

"You're crying,' my mom whispers. I shake my head as I wipe the tears.

"I know…this is ridiculous. I barely knew him."

"Well, I wouldn't go that far,"

"I would." I say under my breath.

My mother puts an arm around my shoulders, kisses my cheek. Mark, Jackson, and Izzie approach; Mark and Izzie both flushed beyond their fair tone. They'd clearly taken after their mother, Ms. Stevens, in the looks department. And even though she had every reason to hate me (as the only evidence of her husband having had an entire family before hers), she'd managed to foster some kind of stable relationship between us kids. Well mostly Mark and me…he can be annoying as hell, sure, but half sister or not, we're a lot more a like than he and Izzie…and neither of us have to try as hard. Wish I could say things came as naturally for me and my Dad .… but that's neither here nor there, I guess.

We siblings hugged messily. Mark and Izzie greeted my mother and the three of us 'kids' made our way to the casket.

It didn't take long for Izzie to be carried away, Mark barely glanced into the box before he started hyperventilating, and once he'd managed to walk away it was my turn.

And I stared.

My father's face looked like wax…or red clay; the expression molded on to what seemed like a plastic skeleton. Only his hands looked like him; so I touched one. Lightly at first. They were hard…not warm, not cold; but solid. I crept my fingers in between his folded palms and held on while taking him in. Looking him over meticulously.

When it was time to put him in the ground, Jackson and I walked away.

"Wet grass," he said, inhaling as we wandered.

"I know right. If I closed my eyes I could swear it was spring."

"Like, a freezing cold spring."

I smile, "Yeah,"

He covers the hands I have hiding in the crook of his elbow with one of his.

" I know I'm not doing this right…and I'm sorry."

I take a minute. "Don't be…I really don't even know what I need. I just…sometimes I don't want to be bothered and sometimes I can't breathe if I don't see you. I have…no idea how to lose a parent I was just getting to know."

Jackson nodded and said, "I think your mom's right. I can't stay more than a week or two, but you should take as long as you need,"

"Jackson."

"I'm serious. Stick around a few months with your family. Pilot season isn't 'til January, your agents are on break…"

"This isn't my family. And if everyone's on break, why don't you stay with me?"

"I _just_ got this job, Cal."

"But the students aren't even back yet, "

"We've got staff meetings the week after next. Now… I _can_ and _will_ call out if you need me to, Sugar. But I can't guarantee I'll have a job when we get back."

I shake my head, "No. That'd be stupid. And…I'd probably ignore you the whole time as weird as I've been…"

Jackson chuckles.

"But I like having you around, " I say lowly, sliding my hand down to clasp his. He faces me and pauses to kiss my forehead, the bridge of my nose, and with his fingertips holds the point of my chin as he kisses my lips.

"Marry me, " He says on to my mouth.

"Next fall, " I whisper back.

As we walk back, he asks why I'm not watching the interment. I shrug.

People were still gathered at the site. Jackson looks intently at the crowd, and back at me; his broken fiancée. He tells me to make my way back to the car; he'll grab Izzie's keys so we can leave. I smile gratefully, turn on my heels, and walk slowly to where the hill begins to slope. Gazing at the parking lot below, I take off my shoes…think for a minute and remove my stockings as well before walking down. Cold, slick blades of grass on the soles of my feet. By the time I reach the bottom, I realize I've been skipping…and am now out of breath. Leaning my back up against a car to catch it, a knock comes from within. Someone rapping at the tinted window. It rolls down and sky blue orbs looks up at me.

"Get yer butt outta my face,"

I respond with a grin. The door opens and Arizona scoots away to make room for me to slide in to the backseat and close the door behind me.

"Were you in here the whole time?" I ask.

"Just long enough to watch you frolic down that hill,"

I snort.

"I was like 'fall! Fall! F—' "

I shove Arizona and we fall into a cackle. She finally sighs and confesses,

"I just don't like the burial part."

I shift my eyes.

"…It's just, if I don't see them go away…maybe they don't. " She continues.

I swallow hard in an attempt to prevent the inevitable.

"Oh Jesus. I'm sorry. Sorry. I'm so—" She panics and I feel her softly rubbing my back.

"It's been like this all day. Can't control these involuntary tears…they don't make any sense," I sob. "I literally feel the same exact way…couldn't even tell my fiancé why I didn't want to watch."

Arizona frowns and begins to wipe my tears with the back of her hand.

I sigh.

The driver's side door flies open.

"Gabby!"

"Oh Callie! Hey, I've been looking for you. How are you?" She turns all the way around and pauses. "Well obviously not well if you're in here with this one," She smiles.

"I'm ok. Arizona actually caught me …eh..._walking_ down that hill."

"Oh. So you've met" Gabby's smile grows.

"Yeah. She caught _me_ smoking on the porch." Arizona shrugs.

Gabby's eyes widen.

"Gabby, it's ok," I laugh. "We're not 12 anymore. You can smoke."

"I mean, _I_ don't." Gabby turns to face front.

Arizona takes the opportunity to nod fervently to me, insinuating that Gabby was indeed lying. I laugh and spot Jackson outside.

"Oh, there's my fiancé," I open the door and get out.

"Oh!" Gabby gets out as well. We gather around the car.

"Gabby, this is Jackson."

Jackson politely hugs Gabby.

"I don't think I formally introduced you at the airport, " I continue.

"That's fine, " Gabby smiles and sees Jackson looking towards the woman seated behind the rolled down back window of her car. "Oh that's Arizona," she explains "My wife."


	3. Horseradish

**APOLOGIES: AT ONE POINT THE NAME 'SAM' WAS IN THE PLACE OF SOME OF THE 'MARK"S...MY BAD. PLEASE RE READ AND ENJOY...caps give me anxiety, but this was important :)**

* * *

"**WIFE?!"**

We all look to see Mark approaching.

And I let go of a breath I didn't know I'd been holding; I could've sworn that was my thought being screamed out loud.

"Mark!" Jackson elbows him as he stands with crossed arms.

Arizona waves adorably from the backseat as she's introduced and I can't help but smile.

"Just want to establish that she's gay—that I heard right," Mark waves back with a grin.

"Arizona, this is Mark, Callie and Izzie's brother," Gabby hides a smirk.

"_Half_ brother," I cut my eyes at him.

"Ouch," He responds sarcastically.

And the laugh that Arizona and Gabby proceed to share puts the same pang of unfamiliar anger in the pit of my stomach that I'd felt earlier with Jackson. As if I'm annoyed…as if I'd rather not share the one person I can stand right now…As If.

Izzie comes up behind us, "I wanna go home too. I'll drive."

"Do you guys want to come to ours?" Gabby offers. "…Have some drinks? Avoid the crowd…"

"That sounds amazing," Izzie sighs.

"Splendid. We'll follow you guys. We're further up though," Jackson says, leading us siblings away.

* * *

By the time our car is parked a few streets up from the neighbor's driveway (to avoid being found out by prying family members), Gabby's has to have been there at least 20 minutes. Jackson, Izzie, Mark, and I scurry to the front door and are grateful to find it unlocked.

"What took you guys so long?" Gabby says from the island in the now enormous kitchen.

"Yeah, we thought you bailed," Arizona moseys in to the room eating an orange. They'd both changed into jeans from their formal funeral attire. Gabby wears a sweatshirt and Arizona a very worn out tank top with dropping armholes. I'm not positive how two people in the same house can have such contrasting body temperatures…doesn't matter to me...I just wonder if Arizona knows we can pretty much see her entire midsection through that armhole. There's no way Mark'll survive, it's extraordinarily distracting.

"_Someone_ took forever to decide what kind of alcohol to bring –" Izzie gestures to Mark.

"—So we brought it all!" He swings the two grocery bags in his hands about.

"Oh, you guys! We have plenty!" Gabby waves us into the kitchen.

"What about the rest of your family?" Arizona trails behind me.

"Oh, we're already up shit creek." I reply.

"They don't know you're here?"

"They don't know where we are." Izzie chimes in.

"They wouldn't recognize it if they came in here anyway…you guys really gutted this place out." Mark grabs a beer and walks around with his mouth agape.

"Yeah," Gabby shrugs.

"It's beautiful," He adds. "Just like a big…cabin-loft. I'd never guess from the outside; _that_ looks exactly the same as it always did."

Gabby smiles, "We were going for a warm, lofty feel."

"He's a carpenter," Izzie says apologetically to Arizona.

"Oh it's fine. I completely understand… I built this kitchen." Arizona responds.

Eight eyes fly open. Gabby glances up from her cooking and smiles proudly.

"You're a contractor?" Mark lifts a brow.

Arizona shrugs.

"She's a jack of all trades…except she's annoyingly adept at all of it." Gabby announces still smiling proudly. "She sells every picture she takes, she's written a New York Times best seller…it's ridiculous."

Arizona grabs a beer and shrugs again, exiting the room. Mark follows suit.

I watch them depart and blink away a fleeting wave of apprehension, then turn back to Gabby,

"What are you making?"

"Smells_ so_ good." Jackson exclaims.

Gabby laughs, "Everything. Garlic Mashed Potatoes, some corn over here…I think we're gonna put steaks on the grill…"

"Oh my God," Izzie clasps her hands together excitedly.

"I bet all you wanna do is eat," Says Gabby.

"Well yes, but that's Jackson every day." I quip.

"You need to stop projecting," Says Izzie rolling her eyes.

"Oh I remember. Callie's eyes have always been bigger than her stomach…Ordering meals of a full grown man before the age of 10…and never ever finishing," Gabby laughs.

I roll my eyes with a smile, "Whatever Gabby, I remember clearing every plate at your house!"

"No I heard her parents secretly gave you smaller plates so you didn't feel bad." Says Mark as he and Arizona re-enter (now _he_'s eating an orange).

"—Oh my God, Mark!" Gabby threw an ear of corn his way.

"_Whaaat?!_" I screech through a laugh. "Hold on! You guys kept secrets from me? I thought you were _my_ friend, Gabby."

"Please. None of your friends could resist all of this," Mark gestures slowly down his body.

"Gross," Arizona says with lifted brows.

I nod in agreement.

Jackson grabs a bottle of rum and begins pouring drinks.

"So what do _you_ do, Gabby?" He asks.

"I'm a pediatric neurologist."

"In English please," Mark holds up his glass for Jackson.

"Seriously Mark? 'Pedi'? 'Neuro'? You can't guess from the prefixes? Kids and Brains moron. She's kid-brain doctor, understand?" Huffs Izzie.

"Well excuse _me_, Iz, but we weren't all English Majors," Mark cuts his eyes.

There was a pause.

"Uh…pretty much. Yeah _we _were." I nod gesturing to Izzie and myself, "Me, Iz, Dad, My mom, your mom…even Jackson."

"Shut up, Cal. It's not my fault I'm a left-brained phenomenon."

"Oh so mediocrity is now phenomenal? Interesting."

Arizona spits out her beer at my retort.

"What do you Torres' do any way?" She asks chuckling as she wipes her mouth.

"As you know, Mark's a carpenter; Izzie moonlights as lingerie model Bethany Whisper—" I start.

"—I'm not Bethany Whisper!"

"Izzie's an editor, and I'm an actress," I continue.

"She likes to tell people I'm Bethany Whisper...thinks it's hilarious. It's not even funny."

"It's funny." Gabby and Arizona say in unison.

"What's _funny_ is that _she's_ the model, but wants people to take her seriously so she tells them she's an actress." Izzie hisses.

"My mom used to send a mass text of every ad she saw you in," Gabby smiles at me. I smile back sadly.

"You know…we loved your parents," Izzie interjects…as gently as Izzie can.

"I know, I know, " Gabby says, beginning to mash the potatoes, "I should've called….said something…I know."  
"It's ok, " Izzie quickly retreats.

"No…you guys were like their kids too…it was just…really sudden, you know?"

"Yeah," Mark nods.

"And you guys are so far away," Gabby gestures with her chin to Mark and me.

"I mean this guy follows me everywhere," I smirk at Mark who shakes his head with a smile,

"If you're going to make it big, I just want to ride on your coat tails. Actress…model... either way your friends are gonna be sexy."

"That's not what you told me. You said, there's no way you're letting Callie move all the way to L.A. all by herself. To which I was insulted…since I'm there too…but…"

Jackson trails off shrugging.

"Awww, sweet boy," I beam at Mark. He rolls his eyes.

"Well I stuck around," Izzie insists with a frown, "You could've called me,"

"Really…I didn't want to bother any of you. I mean...your dad had just been diagnosed, he and Cal were just starting to patch things up…" Gabby shrugs, "it was a weird time."

"…So you became a lesbian," Mark nods understandingly.

The room erupts in laughter. Like knee slapping, side-splitting hoots are coming out of us all. When it finally dies down, Gabby turns off the stove and asks Arizona to get the tequila. She responds with a wide smile and a surprised set of eyes. We all clap until her return.

Between the third and fourth shot, Gabby responds to Mark's declaration.

"I was always into girls by the way," she says.

Mark points repeatedly to himself, "But you _always_ made out with me,"

"Probably because you look like your hot, hot sisters," Arizona shares a smile with Gabby who concedes.

An onslaught of instigating remarks flood the room; sounding like many excited "Ooooh!"'s and enthused "Daaaamn"'s .

"I mean it's a sliding scale…but clearly that ship has sailed," Gabby continues, pecking Arizona as we all bring our plates into the living room and eat.

"Well thanks a lot. You made me develop a type…where the hell else am I going to find a girl with those eyes?" Mark demands.

Gabby shrugs. "Hazel? Everyone's got these nowadays."

"It really is lovely that you and Arizona are married though…we can't wait. " Jackson begins rubbing my back. I flinch for a second—this isn't tender like the last time. His fingers aren't molding around my ribs… there isn't that warmth on my skin where he touches…I can't for the life of me paint much of a visual picture of my most recent backrub; I mean I know we were in the backseat of a car and I just remember how the feeling nearly took my breath away. Whatever he did then was different from anyth—Oh shit. That wasn't him.

I roll my eyes at Jackson's comment to clear my cloudy mind. My eyes wander to Arizona and I catch her rolling hers as well as she bites back a smile.

"When did you know?" Mark asks Arizona and Gabby.

"I can honestly say that I knew I how I felt about Arizona in high school." Gabby smiles at her wife.

"I was here like every weekend! How did I not know?!" I flail.

"Well you wouldn't've even known if you went to our school…I mean _I_ didn't even know." Arizona says lowly.

Izzie gets up to pour more drinks.

"Well no, I didn't make it very obvious…and I wasn't quite out…" Gabby admits.

"Yeah. Didn't you have a boyfriend?" I give Gabby a sidelong glance as she takes a re-filled glass from Izzie.

"Sure," Gabby replied. "But I mean I never stopped falling for Arizona...the crush never left. A few years passed…and we end up working together when the hospital built a clinic…some business dinners later and the rest is—"

"STEAKS!" Arizona blurts out. "I forgot the steaks."

"I wasn't gonna say anything but…" I mumble.

"…Greedy," Mark mutters disapprovingly.

I giggle –Oh. I'm drunk. Mark's only funny when I'm drunk.

"_Callie,_" Whines Izzie. Yeah she's drunk too.

"_Izzie_?" I mock.

"Can you please make your steak sauce?"

"Oh! Yeah!" Jackson and Mark plead; clearly liquored up as well… they literally grovel at my feet when I try to get up. In an attempt to crawl out of their grasp, I turn towards the kitchen; where I find Arizona looking back and smiling. I blink, and suddenly can't wait to join her.

"Oh my God yes! Arizona, show Callie where the horse radish is!" Gabby yells.

As I make my way to the kitchen, I try to assess my situation. Whenever I drink for a while and then stand up, I know just how wasted I am. At the moment, my lips are tingling, my muscles are relaxed, and my filter is no longer functional…I also can't seem to keep my mind off Arizona and Gabby laughing…or Arizona and Mark leaving the room together…or Arizona and I rolling our eyes at the same time…_buuut_ I am neither stumbling no slurring. It's a happy medium. No one would have to know. By now I've reached the kitchen and am standing on the outside of the open refrigerator door. Arizona pops up from the other side and looks me up and down slowly. Even though she can't stop laughing, her gaze is setting my stomach on fire; I'm sure the flips it's performing are to put it out.

"You're drunk," she manages to get out.

"Damnit," I mutter.

"Your face is… so confused" she giggles.

"I'm not," I pout, grabbing some ingredients and putting them in an empty bowl to prepare outside. Arizona hands me the horseradish and carries a pan of marinated steaks into the backyard, still chuckling. She pours fresh charcoal onto the grill while I remember myself and go back for coats. Returning and handing one to Arizona I say,"I bet we're the only two weirdoes grilling in November."

Arizona snorts.

The lit coals begin to heat up and she joins me on the picnic bench.

"What?" She says and I lift my eyes.

"What what?"

"You were stealing looks from under those thick lashes…something you want to ask me?"

I clear my throat, "N-no."

"I know what you want." Her dimples deepen and my heart races.

She reaches under the table and into her pocket to bring out a box. Her weed kit. I lift a brow and finally nod my head. She begins to pack a bowl as I work on the final mix for the steak sauce, but I stop abruptly,

"You know what I just thought?"

"How you bitched me out that time for asking you if you wanted to smoke and now you're practically begging for it?"

I laugh, "No…how we probably shouldn't be handling a grill."

Arizona takes a minute, looks up from her task. She then starts a laugh that ends in us folded over the table and gasping for air. After a few failed attempts –due to the last little chuckles—Arizona finally lights and takes a long hit of the bowl. We pass it back and forth in silence; then pause to start cooking the steaks. A few more hits until the bowl smokes no more.

My eyes are suddenly low. I haven't been this far under the influence in a while and there's a familiar cloud in the front of my mind. So when the voice comes out of my mouth, it startles me.

"I had no idea about Gabby y'know. We were like family and she never told me she was into the ladies."

"Well," Arizona says slowly, "You also call her _Gabby_…I mean…you guys started that, right?"

"Oh shit. There's a real name…that we need to call her…shit."

"Leah,"

"Le-aah. Fuck. Leah Murphyyy" I let the name linger then pause. "You think she secretly hates me for that and that's why she didn't tell?"

"No. I mean she introduces her self as that… It's weird. Cute and sad." Arizona chirps.

I get up to flip the steaks and sit back down with a frown.

"Don't be sad…it's like I said, I didn't know either. You're not a bad friend."

"Not even for the 'Gabby' thing?"

"_Please._ I honestly think it makes her fell like, accepted. "

I watch Arizona think about what she just said, then nod, mentally confirming that was ok to divulge.

I shrug, frown unchanged.

"You're not a bad friend," Arizona repeats, her eyes softening with sincerity.

" Arizona, the only reason _you_ didn't know she liked you was that—"

"I knew,"

"What?"

"I…um… knew."

"What?"

"…Leah basically worked through her coming out with our guidance counselor…."

"Oh my God. Mr. Shepherd…she would _not_ stop talking about him,"

"Yeah. That was her mentor."

"So…"

"He…called me to his office one day and told me."

"Wait—"

Arizona's eyes fell and she sighed. "He basically told me she'd been pining after me for years and could use my help out of the closet…even as a friend. But I was, you know, otherwise preoccupied with uh… well sleeping around… and around…and around..." Arizona looked up catching herself in a babble, "See? I'm the bad friend…"

"You love her enough to not want to hurt her over something that happened so many years ago. It's irrelevant at this point."

"I guess,"

We lock eyes.

"Arizona. She will never find out."

Arizona rubbed her eyes and smiles sadly; pulling her hair back into a ponytail she says,

"No, I guess not…I mean I never told anyone—except now you, but… God… I never told _anyone_." Her hands fall onto the picnic table. I lift my brows and say,

"I'm so stoned, I'll probably forget. So no. You never told anyone. All I'll remember is that you were right."

"About what?"

"You're definitely a worse friend," I smirk.

"Jerk!" Arizona shoves me across the table; she then snickers and after a heavy sigh, gets up and cuts into the steaks, "Perfect. The key is not to pay any attention at all."

I get up, join her at the grill and stick a fork in an entire slab taking a big bite.

"No!" Arizona giggles, slapping the fork out of my hand.

"So good," I mumble through a full mouth as I watch my utensil and whatever part of the slab that wasn't in my mouth hit the ground.

We scream and Arizona laughs so hard she's shaking in place.

"Ok ok, pick it up! Pick it up!" I flap my hands maniacally.

"We're not eating this," Arizona finally recovers and retrieves the meat with two fingers.

"I might." I say after a while.

Arizona shrugs, "I'll try not to judge."

Frankly, I can't say who ate it, but someone did. We go back inside and are each handed a bottle to 'catch up'… By the time we get to steaks, we're all belligerent and at the point of pouncing. All six of us eat like a pack of wolves. Utensils forgotten. Only hands and teeth.

**A/N**

**Extra chapter for the weekend :) Thanks for reading!**


	4. The Family

[third person POV]

Mark blinked his eyes open to find wheat-colored strands tickling his face. He leaned across to find the serene, sleeping face of Leah. Momentarily tracing the length of her neck with his eyes, he found the skin to be like delicious milk. Looking around, it seemed everyone else strewn about the living room as well. There was steak on the floor and somehow none of the couples ended up together.

His sisters were snuggled up on the couch and Jackson and Arizona were back to back under a table. Mark slowly lay back down. As he did, the headache and nausea hit him like an express train. He groaned. Hearing this, Leah turned and nuzzled with closed eyes into his shoulder. Mark's eyes went wide then clasped shut when he noticed movement from the other side of the room.

* * *

"I thought you were waking briskly to make coffee," Jackson turned up at the bathroom door after following Callie.

"I'd love to be making coffee right now," she said, leaning over the toilet. As she shifted, Jackson dry-heaved at what he noticed was already in the bowl. Callie snickered.

"Jackson, you can leave, " she said gently.

"It's not funny."

"A little bit," she said playfully.

"Ok," he paused to gather himself, "I'm leaving…to make coffee, not because –oh God—"

Callie threw up and Jackson darted out, nearly clothes-lining Arizona on the way.

"Woah," the blonde growled, still looking in his direction as she stood in the doorway; then she looked down.

"Ohhhh. Ok…"

"You're not grossed out?" Callie gasped a little.

Arizona absently eyed the impossibly silky tresses falling in Callie's face, the long legs curled on the tile floor,

"Not in the least…" She muttered. "I'll uh get Leah. She's much better at this than me." Arizona continued, stammering.

"No no no. Don't wake her up, I'm fine."

"Fine, throwing up…same diff." The blonde was already half way out the door, better to let someone else handle this one.

It would be a while before Leah arrived; she'd woken herself up. Out of breath from sprinting, she charged through the bathroom door, slammed it behind her (barely missing Callie) and threw up in the sink.

"One bathroom?" muttered Callie. "You have one bathroom in this castle?"

Leah shuddered through her first full breath, "Double vanity."

Callie huffed in response. The each silently swore off drinking for good…or maybe just for now.

In the kitchen, both Mark and Arizona were peeling oranges while Jackson brewed coffee and Izzie watched,

"Where the hell's everyone getting these oranges?!" She almost yelled.

Arizona blinked, "She's always like this, huh?"

Mark nodded as he pointed outside, "There's a tree in the yard."

Izzie pouted and found her way out. Jackson poured two mugs of freshly brewed coffee.

"They're not gonna want any," Said Arizona.

Jackson winked and brought both mugs to the bathroom anyway.

The blonde shook her head.

"He grows on ya," Mark said, pouring himself a mug.

Arizona shrugged, "I didn't say anything."

"When he first started coming over, I honestly thought it was a joke. I thought Cal was just trying to make me laugh."

Arizona smiled.

"I mean yes," Mark continued. "I get it, he's handsome, but he's totally one of those guys me and Callie used to make fun of."

"Seems alright to me,"

"I've seen you rolling your eyes."

"…I have…astigmatism."

Mark paused. "All I'm saying is he really wants to be in with the family."

"Sorry, what?" Arizona smirked.

"You heard what I said."

"How am I, by being married to someone who is of no relation to you, 'part of the family'? What is this…the mafia?"

"Don't be a smart ass..."

Arizona cocked he head back, impressed.

"…Be nice," Mark smirked.

* * *

After a few hours, the house is quiet. Callie had started feeling better and she and Jackson left. Mark and Izzie stuck around a few minutes more, thinking they were being polite –but in fact quite visibly awkward— then let themselves out. Leah and Arizona have ended up at opposite ends of the house, until Arizona approaches,

"You wanna tell me what's bothering you?"

The other blonde is making their bed and turns momentarily,

"Not particularly, no."

"Then there is something."

"You asked didn't you?"

"Ok…what is it?"

"Nothing worth arguing about."

"So you're just going to be kind of an asshole?"

Leah shrugs and turns away to continue making the bed.

And so, as her mind races, Arizona finds herself slamming through the back door. By the time Callie arrives, the blonde is pacing. In turn, Callie crosses her arms. And it is briefly noted that her raven locks are in a ponytail and that she is freshly showered…maybe even relaxed.

"Were you…waiting?" Callie smirks.

Arizona's pacing stops abruptly. "I'm an only child, ok?"

"Uh…ok?"

"I have no way of knowing what's wrong with me…there's no one to make fun of me for it. No one I shared with –not my feelings, not my clothes…I don't _understand_ siblings…like, how are people so mad one second and fucking fine the next? The only reference I have are friends, and I can just cut them—"

"Hold on…I'm sorry…I'm not following…" Callie interjects.

Arizona begins to shake her head; she places an open palm on her brow.

The brunette watches her for a minute, "Ok…alright…let's not freak-out. Why don't…let's get off these porches. Come on."

Callie nimbly hopped over the porch fence and in to their shared backyard. She gestured with her head towards the woods, inviting Arizona to follow her. There was hesitation, but eventually, just before the girl disappeared behind the oaks, Arizona obliged.

"Okay," Callie sighed, allowing her to catch up.

"Okay," Arizona sighed back.

"So…"

"Sorry."

"For what?"

"Leah's upset with me about something, so I'm guessing I must've offended your family."

"You didn't do anything to me."

"Did your brother? Or your…Jackson say anything?"

"No." Callie shook her head with a furrowed brow.

They came to a clearing. By a stream, of course. Callie hadn't encountered natural beauty in a while, so she took a seat on a fallen log and blinded herself watching the setting sun reflect off the water, as if the stream had stars.

Finally Arizona sat. Looking for a moment, Callie noticed their footwear was strikingly similar. In fact, she began to see how eerily their outfits matched. Puffy coats, dark corduroys, and doc martens.

"Um," Callie's voice cracked. Arizona turned to her and squinted. The sun was now behind Callie, and covering the face of the blonde in front of her. She saw the dark sapphire of the woman's eyes transition to a pale sea foam blue. A tiny braid crowned one side of her many blonded locks. There were all kinds of yellows and browns in there.

"This is probably the first time I've seen you in the light," Callie stated.

Arizona looked from the girl's left eye to her right and back again.

"The wake."

"That was not light"

"Don't think I'll ever see at all again with this sun in my eyes."

"We're not switching." Callie smirked saucily.

"Then make it quick."

"I was going to say…that I did…"

Arizona squinted impatiently.

"…hear you talking about Jackson."

"Shit." Arizona's eyes darted back to the stream.

"But I didn't tell Leah."

"Your brother just told me to be nice…that's all."

Callie shrugged, "Yeah, that I heard…but I mean…is Jackson really _that_ unbearable?"

"I mean, no. I'm sure your brother's—"

"—I don't care what he thinks."

The words settled between them, but no look was exchanged.

"What I mean is, he's going to make fun of everything that has to do with me…and yes, I see the looks people give after some of the things Jackson says... I do always sort of feel like I'm protecting him…but the things they say never quite make me angry. They don't bother me."

"Me not liking him bothers you? I don't understand how I'm suddenly so important to your family."

"I know. And I know we were drunk, but what bothers me is that we made fun of him together."

"No we didn't."

Callie nodded. "We did."

"How? I don't—"

"We looked at each other. Rolled our eyes when he said he couldn't wait to get married."

"Oh _that?_"

"Yes that. And don't pull that astigmatism shit with me."

"You heard that too, huh?"

They snickered.

"I was kidding though, when I rolled my eyes that time. It was a joke." Arizona insisted. There came a small silence. Callie's voice wasn't much above a whisper,

"I probably shouldn't be rolling my eyes at that…like mocking my fiancé's excitement about our impending nuptials?"

Arizona nodded slowly, rubbing her palms on her thighs before standing.

"Ok," She began to pace again. This time slower and on dry leaves; it was loud.

"You and me are the kind of people who go out to the back porch. The people we married—will marry—are not. They don't like..._do_ sadness. They do love at first sight and sappy wedding stories…"

"Listen…I'm not some melancholy—"

"That's not what I'm saying, Calliope" Arizona sighed, "I'll try just speaking for myself...I'm the type of person who needs a reality check…there's only so far pity can go when I'm feeling miserable. If people keep saying 'sorry' instead of 'that sucks'…I just kind of…stay sad. If I were in your situation…I'd probably feel the need for Jackson to acknowledge something besides joy…and love. I'd need him to recognize the reality of my dad's death…if…I were you."

Callie's features pulled to the center of her face. She bawled.

Arizona's eyes widened and she sat back on the log, watching as hands covered the shaking woman's face; which now resembled that of a six year old.

"I grew up an only child too," Callie sniffled after a while.

" That's what Leah meant?…about you and your dad patching things up?"

Callie nodded. "This is my—was—my father's second family."

"Oh,"

"He left us before I could ever have known he existed. So when he shows up…and I'm like 12…"

"Well you _kind of _ grew up with him."

"No. He'd pick me up…however often he felt like it…sometimes every other weekend, usually about once a month….take me to see Izzie, Mark, and Ms. Stevens while he kind of just wandered off."

Arizona swallowed the lump in her throat.

"…Until a few years ago, when he started apologizing…telling me about himself…anyway we were just getting to the good stuff. All these things about me that I just thought were my own weirdo things…finding out I'd gotten them from somebody…well he died on me…so…"

"Just hang around." Arizona suggested.

Callie nodded, still sniffling.

"These people can tell you stuff about your Dad…maybe they're not your family, but they're his and…so are you."

Another sniff.

"You can hold hands with Jackson while you go visit your long lost relatives…make you feel better?" Arizona gave what looked like an apologetic grin.

Callie rolled her glassy eyes and offered a half smile as she rose to walk back home. She paused from a few feet away and dragged her bottom lip between her teeth,

" Arizona,"

"Calliope."

"Whatever Leah's mad about, has nothing to do with you."

"How do you know?"

Callie shook her head and smiled at the ground. "There's just…no way."

The blonde watched her walk away and couldn't help but to blush. This woman was incredible.

* * *

The false sense of elation begins the minute the door slams behind the last distant relative. It was at this point; days and days after the funeral, that Izzie, Mark, and Callie were allowed to celebrate their dad's life. It's really the sad laughter and confessed private moments that bring the grieving family their first smile. Once they, Jackson, Ms. Santos (Callie's mother) and Ms. Stevens closed their doors to the outside world, mourning was an excuse to stay in their little bubble. Days and nights draped around the living room, the six of them began to have trouble leaving the house.

"I'm hungry. Somebody needs to cook something," muttered Mark from one couch.

"_You_ wanna do it?" Izzie retorted from the other.

"_You?"_

"_You?!"_

"Oh my God shut up."

Mark settled back into the couch then continued, "Where're Callie and Jackson?"

"I'm sure we don't wanna know."

"They don't do that."

"…Mark"

"If they did, I'd have to kill him."

"Those earplugs you sleep with must be industrial strength."

"They are."

"Yeah he'd be dead 3 or 4 times a night if—"

"I _said_ they are."

Jackson and Callie suddenly entered; quite obviously not having done what was assumed they were doing.

Mark smiled. They looked so innocent of that particular deed that their shared sentiment could easily have been perceived as anger.

"I need—" Started Jackson.

"Shut up." Callie growled.

Both Mark and Izzie turned to face them with furrowed brows and sidelong looks.

"I mean. I'll…just." Callie took a seat.

Jackson went upstairs in a rage.

"Was he…crying?...I…I'm not sure how to respond," Mark said as he looked back to the television.

"Yeah they don't really do this," Izzie agreed.

There was a pause.

"What exactly are you doing?" Mark turned to Callie.

Callie closed her eyes. She fell asleep right there. No one really tried to wake her; that's not how things worked in this house anymore. People were left where they were. Feathers unruffled.

So when she woke up at 2:27am and momentarily forgot where she was, it came as no surprise. She hadn't ever woken up in this living room before; her father would have never allowed it. As Callie reflected on her father, she once again found herself somewhere she didn't mean to be.

"You lost?" Arizona looked back at her from her seat on the fallen log.

Callie blinked at the forest around her, "Kinda. I don't remember getting here."

Arizona tilted her head. "You sleep walking?"

"No."

"You sure?"

"I'm pregnant."


	5. Super Magic

[Third Person POV]

Arizona's eyes ballooned. Her dark lashes nearly touched her brows

"You're what?"

Callie doesn't blink, "I am…with child."

"Holy shit." Arizona exhaled. She stood to face Callie, who was still a few oaks away when she continued,

"And Jackson needs a ride to the airport."

"…what?"

"And I need you to be that ride."

Arizona's mouth formed words, but none came out. So Callie continued,

"…Because no one else knows I'm pregnant. Just you. And him."

"And he's leaving?" Arizona finally managed.

"And he's leaving."

* * *

To say the ride to the airport was awkward would be a tremendous understatement. Just about everyone was visibly angry, including Arizona, which was strange, but oddly comforting to Callie. The three of them sat in silence for far too long and Arizona finally spoke…which seemed like a good idea in theory.

"I thought your flight was next week."

From the passenger's seat, Callie squinted her eyes and turned slowly to give Arizona an incredulous glare.

The blonde shrugged with her eyes on the road, not quite believing it herself.

"I've gotta go." Jackson said, staring out the window.

"…too bad." Arizona continued, uncomfortably.

"Yeah well. Things change." He suddenly blurted.

"Schedules…" Arizona interjected, glancing at Callie.

"I guess," He muttered.

When they arrived at the departure gate, the car barely came to a stop before Jackson grabbed his luggage and got out; walking through the automatic doors and never looking back.

Arizona turned to Callie as they watched him disappear,

"He knows it's his, right?"

"Yes Arizona." She growled.

"I'm sorry, but he's acting—"

"They're honking, Arizona. Move."

"Right."

As she pulled off, Arizona began to chew on the inside of her cheek. Callie looked around after a while and realized why.

"We're lost?" The brunette was exhausted.

"No."

"Arizona."

"We're _not._ I'm trying to cheer you up…but I'm also terrified."

Callie sighed and closed her eyes.

"Aaaand open!" She heard almost immediately. Arizona smiled widely.

"I think you may have misunderstood. 'Cheer up' means 'make happy', not 'thoroughly depress.'"

"There she is" Arizona smirked, "…just trust me."

The smell…that's always the first thing. Then the linoleum, the lights. Callie had spent the better part of the last few years in one of these. A hospital. She felt the urge to turn back, but didn't have the strength. They took an elevator to a floor below the lobby…and here it was. A completely different world. As soon as the doors opened there were children of all sizes racing around happily. Arizona and Callie stood outside the elevator and noted small yellow sticker footprints that led to exam rooms. Ribbons, balloons, toys, posters, books everywhere. And laughter. Lots of laughter. It rang through the short hallway they walked, echoed across the overpass, and multiplied in the gigantic playroom where they ended up. Some how they'd also acquired a fan club on the way. Arizona wore an entire outfit of giggling three, four, and five year olds. Callie had just about a kid per finger, each holding on tightly; some hands too small to grasp. Suddenly Arizona stopped.

"Hey Callie, I feel like something's changed,"

Callie and the kids giggled.

"Like maybe I've gained some weight," Arizona continued.

More giggling.

A tiny voice whispered, "no."

"No?" she replied.

"No!" they all screamed and ran ahead as she chased them into the room. It was more like a gymnasium. But full of every colorful piece of equipment a child could imagine.

There were several trampolines, bicycles, uneven bars, every size ball in the world, a Velcro wall, a rock climbing wall, a ball pit, scooters, a stage, swings…everything. It had to be the largest room Callie had ever seen. She stood in the doorway grinning goofily attempting to take it all in. Like a dream.

"Come, come." Appeared an ebullient brunette by her side. "It can be overwhelming, I know."

Callie spotted Leah greeting Arizona, "Ohhh," she said, making the connection….they were visiting the other blonde at her job.

The ebullient brunette, Dr. Heron as she'd excitedly introduced herself, followed Callie's eye line and nodded, "Before she started this, these kids had nothing but death, illness, and frustration in their eyes."

"Wow."

"Mhm. That girl is really something else. I have never seen children so naturally gravitate to a being. I swear, they can see her heart in those eyes. Once they get to playing, she's just _like_ them."

Callie smiled, "Yeah, Leah's come a long way."

The woman paused, "Oh sure…_she_ has. I should know, I hired her. But that _Arizona_…she's a gift. She came up to me about 5 years ago and wouldn't stop talking about this space...what she could do with it. I've seen her vision come to life…and she's watched these babies grow up in here."

"Arizona?"

The woman nodded, "Leah's…good. She is an amazing neurologist…the kids…you know… like her uh…once she warms up. But Arizona? Just has this way. Watching her interact with tiny humans…well let's just say I've tried to hire her about a dozen times!" The woman laughed.

"She can pretty much put the light in anybody's eyes." Callie smiled as she watched Arizona kneel, apparently explaining the concept of sharing to two differently-abled toddlers grasping an enormous ball. The brunette couldn't hear what she was saying, but she saw a hint of a smirk on the woman's lips. The blue of her eyes became a periwinkle and hey formed crescents, just itching for a smile. Dr. Heron watched Callie gaze at Arizona and tilted her head saying, "Not to mention…the girl is gorgeous,"

Callie nodded dreamily, then snapped to face the woman with an awkward smile, realizing what she just did.

"What am I saying? Look at this face!" The doctor cupped Callie's cheeks suddenly.

"Alright, Sydney." Arizona approached.

"What? I'm trying to figure out where it is you girls get these darling looks from!"

Sydney cackled as she waved a hand and danced away.

Arizona stood next to Callie and gazed at the children.

"See?" The blonde sighed, "Happiest place on earth."

Callie glanced at her, then back at the kids, "Thank you."

She knew if she looked at Arizona, the woman would be smiling at her. And right now, if she saw that smile…well she already wanted to hold the hand that was gently grazing hers, so…who can say what desire would follow.

Callie felt the presence of another, much smaller; hand on the back of her thigh. She looked to find a little girl standing by her side.

"I've been here all day," She said.

"All day?" Callie crouched down to get a better view.

The girl shrugged.

"I told her to keep an eye on you." Arizona looked down at them both with a smile.

Callie made the mistake of looking directly at the grin. _Super Magic_, she thought, then quickly turned back to the little girl to prevent herself from swooning.

"You're doing a great job, Lee." Arizona continued, crouching down next to Callie.

"I don't like touching. But…how else can I make sure you're there when my blinks get in the way?" Lee said matter-of-factly. She couldn't have been more than five years old.

"Valid point." Callie conceded.

"Pants are ok. I touch pants" Lee shrugged.

"That's ok," Arizona nodded. "You don't have to do skin. You don't have to do anything you don't wanna do."

The girl took a very deep breath. "Good." She exhaled.

"I know it wasn't easy. So thank you for looking after me." Callie smiled at the girl.

"It's hard because my autism…but it's easy because your pretty smile. I like it." Lee smiled back.

"Me too." Arizona got lost in the brunette's profile.

The women locked eyes and quickly stood; once again looking on at the mass of kids to snap themselves out of it... a subtle smile shared between them.

Later, Leah met them in the parking lot.

"Shoulda told me you were coming," She absently pecked Arizona while getting in the front seat.

Arizona stole a nervous glance and a twitchy smile in Callie's direction, as she and her wife pulled apart.

"My fault," the brunette said from the back seat, darting her eyes to the window.

"Oh not at all, Callie! _Arizona_ here likes to just pop up. And while it's a nice surprise, it throws my whole schedule off."

"Schedules…change…" Callie muttered.

"Yeah but routine is an integral—"

"—Leah." Arizona stopped her, shaking her head cryptically.

Leah started the car, befuddled.

Arizona soon started a light conversation, which she and Leah maintained for the duration of the ride to Callie's. When they arrived, Callie whispered a 'thanks' and made her way inside, almost visibly pained.


	6. Daddy

Questions about Jackson were sparse. Everyone in Callie's family got one in, but really all she had to do was be vague about an emergency back home and interest was lost. Admittedly, Ms. Torres had her suspicions, but she had to leave only a week later. In her absence, there was no one around to take note of Callie's ill-fitting clothes and change in diet. Perhaps if she'd seen Arizona in all this time, she'd have an ear; someone else who knew; who wasn't avoiding her. She'd know how obvious it was that she was hiding… Everything. But months had passed and the only thing that became obvious to Callie was that the two people who knew about her…_condition_… had disappeared.

She'd tried the back porch, the stream, calling Jackson, emailing Jackson, his friends, his family…she hadn't even seen Leah. Her brother, sister, and their mom were ultimately useless; still in the 'bubble', their conversations were pretty superficial.

She had real questions; pre-natal vitamins and such. In spite of it all, she felt no inclination to divulge to anyone in her house. None. For all she knew they'd disappear too… Okay, no they wouldn't –couldn't really— but they were in no position to nurture and she was in no mood to be the new center of attention.

* * *

"I wish you'd come to me sooner," Frowned Dr. Montgomery.

"The baby's healthy though?"

Dr. Montgomery furrowed her brow at the screen as she guided the probe on Callie's abdomen.

"Yes, everything's in order for this month."

"Okay," Callie pulled down her shirt, not bothering to wipe away the jelly.

"Ms. Torres—"

"—Don't worry. I'll be back, but I don't have insurance, and I know you don't charge by the minute…but you do charge by the equipment so—"

Callie grabbed her purse and rushed out.

"Next month!" Dr. Montgomery called after her.

From the front desk, Callie waved the doctor off and nodded at the receptionist saying, "You heard her."

The receptionist smiled and filled out an appointment card.

"A month? Isn't that a little soon?" A familiar voice to Callie's right.

"Well some high risk pregnancies—" started the receptionist without looking up.

"—Excuse me!" Callie barked, not looking away from the receptionist, who looked up startled, "Oh I'm sorry Ms. Torres, I thought she was with you."

Callie shook her head as she snatched her appointment card. She snapped her head towards the intrusive bystander. A pair of clear blue eyes looked back.

"Arizona."

"Hi,"

Callie resisted a very strong urge to hug her right there at the front desk.

Arizona gave a tired smile and walked with her to the parking lot.

"What are you doing at the obstetrician?" Callie asked as they stopped at her car.

There came a small silence.

"Are you—?"Callie continued.

"No! No."

"Oh,"

"…Not me."

"What?! Leah's pregnant? Where is she?!"

"At work. I'm just picking up her prescription."

Callie looked Arizona over. She wore a messy bun and a sweat suit.

"You look tired…and not so baby crazy."

"Well…you look amazing."

Callie blushed, "Don't change the subject…what's with the long face? I always figure in the end, there'll be a delicious baby so no matter wh—"

"Callie—"

"And you're having it with someone who doesn't hateyou right now so, I mean—"

"Calliope I—"

"—you're married. Having a kid. And she didn't fly to the other side of the—"

"YOUR BROTHER!"

"Um. What?"

"IT'S YOUR BROTHER'S KID!"

"What's my brother's k—" Callie's heart stopped. Then fell. Air wasn't coming as easily into her lungs.

Arizona dropped her head. She was seething.

"_This_ is why Leah was acting so weird after the night we all got drunk; why she was being so cold to me…the night we all had that sleep over she had drunk sex with your brother… he doesn't remember though. He doesn't know. She started having flashbacks the next day and when she tested the waters later on to see if he had any recollection…nothing. So we're keeping it to ourselves. The secret…the kid."

"Oh." Callie exhaled, putting her hands in her pockets. "Shit."

"Yeah," Arizona nodded, still looking at the ground.

Callie began to breathe steadily again, "Is this why I haven't seen you?"

The blonde continued to look at the ground in silence.

"You've been…been there the whole time? Avoiding me?!"

"I couldn't."

"Couldn't _what_ Arizona?!"

"Couldn't SEE YOU, CALLIOPE!"

"I _needed_ you, Arizona! No one else knows I'm pregnant!"

"REALLY?! Your _brother_ impregnated my _wife,_ Callie!I'm sure you can understand that I had my own shit to deal with!"

They suddenly realized they were yelling, and looked around before they lowered their voices.

"I came over _every day_. I called. Drove around…are you telling me tat the both of you timed your entrances, exits….around not seeing me?" Now Callie was seething.

"Not seeing your family. Yes. And it's hard, you seem to multiply."

"Don't be a smart ass, Arizona. Not now."

"Sorry. I—I'm not good at confrontation…Look, I stayed at a friend's for a while and so did Leah. The house's been empty up until the last week or so…we needed time apart because…we didn't know if this could work and I…" Arizona finally made eye contact and lifted her brows.

"What?' Callie goaded.

"…wasn't sure if I …wanted to,"

"Make it work?"

"Yes Calliope. I wasn't sure if I wanted to make it work."

Callie felt a burgeoning smirk—_Hold on now…what's this?_ _Why am I…pleased?_—She quickly spoke to stop the smile from coming along, "And then?"

"Then I thought about you," Blue eyes locked on black. And Callie, under the heat of Arizona's stare, dragged her bottom lip between her teeth.

The blonde had to catch her breath at the sight…it was hard enough to keep her eyes off that pouty mouth. Arizona darted her eyes back to the ground,

"Thought of you…being pregnant alone, I mean. And I don't want that…for either of you."

Callie nodded.

"I miss you," Arizona whispered tenderly, pulling her in for a hug. Her arms swung around the brunette's neck and the embrace was reciprocated tightly around her waist. Callie inhaled deeply, "You smell so good," she whispered.

Arizona pulled away with tears in her eyes, "Alright. I gotta go."

* * *

Izzie shifted her eyes between her mother and her brother. They'd mentioned not having seen the neighbors in months-it was the way they'd always ease into the evening…every evening… before segueing into any other meaningless thing. But today, Mark changed the pace.

"What do _mean_ you talked to Gab—Leah?" Ms. Stevens crossed her arms.

"I mean a while ago she came over asking me some weird questions."

"Like what?" Izzie retorted.

"I don't know? Like, who I'd told and how much I remember…"

"About what?"

"I HAVE NO IDEA. I told her that I was sorry her parents died…and that I missed my dad too."  
"What does that even mean?" Izzie squinted.

"What does any of it even mean? She seemed kinda mad…I was like what the—"

"Mark," Ms. Stevens warned.

"Heck. I said what the heck. She asked me if I remembered the night of the funeral. I said nobody does. We were all so—"

Ms. Stevens gave another warning look.

"Sad," he continued. "We were all so sad."

"Drunk Mom. We were drunk." Izzie waved her arms up.

Ms Stevens shook her head, then thought for a moment, "Go over there and apologize. You probably said something you shouldn't've."

"NO WAY! I'm not apologizing! _She_ should apologize to _me!_"

The front door slammed and Callie made her way into the dining room, where everyone sat.

"Who should apologize to whom?" She said, snatching left over scraps of sandwich from Izzie's plate.

"Leah to me!" Mark all but screamed.

"What happened?" Callie chewed cautiously.

"All of a sudden, Mark remembers he saw her a while ago and she was asking him what he remembered from the night…you know…" Izzie shrugged.

"But no one remembers! And she's all asking me who I told! Told _what?!_ If she spilled some secret it's not my problem!"

Callie's heart raced, "Mark..._Relax._ I'm sure she's fine—"

"You've seen her?"

"No, but I'm sure she was just…being weird." Callie shrugged, feigning nonchalance.

"As _usual_," Mark spread out his arms and whined, "…but _no_, everyone wants to have _me_ apologize. The victim."

"Shut up Mark. Stop being a baby." Callie stuck around just long enough to ensure the conversation shifted, then made her way to the stream.

They hadn't exactly _planned_ on meeting there, but when Arizona hovered over her backed by a starlit midnight hours later, let's just say neither of them was surprised. Callie had decided to lie on her back with her head resting on the fallen log; hands calmly folded over her belly button. Arizona gave a look of confusion, but did the same right by her side.

"Tell your wife to take hold of her preggo mood swings." Callie heard Arizona's head shift against the bark. She could only imagine the look that comment garnered.

"That sounded much pettier than intended," The brunette continued.

"Yeah."

"Well tonight Mark was just recounting to everyone how she came by one time asking him what he remembered."

"Shit…she said she'd been discreet."

"I got there in time to steer them away from the obvious—"

"—and luckily Mark's dense as a London fog."

"Hey now."

"You bitch out my wife, I get one for your brother."

Callie took a beat, "Fair."

"Besides," Arizona twiddled her thumbs after a while, "I have every reason to loathe the thought of Mark. There's no justification for you having anything against Leah."

The brunette shrugged, "I guess I've got preggo hormones too…and…"

"And what?"

"Well I missed you."

"Me?"

"Leah's got something so good with you and she wastes it on Mark. Fucking. Mark."

"Tell me about it." Arizona sighed.

Callie exhaled as well, "Look. I have to tell you something."

"Okay?"

"My father…he died of congestive heart failure."

"Oh," the blonde was caught off guard.

"Um. There's a very good chance I have it too—"

"Oh my God!" Arizona clasped her hands over her mouth.

"—Jackson knows that and he…is mad at me for keeping this child and endangering both of our lives."

Arizona calmed herself, taking a few very deep breaths then finally turning on her side to face Callie,

"So he's not a douche."

"I mean yes and no."

"Yeah I guess he still left his pregnant fiancé"

"Yeah…well. I didn't really feel left until you were gone."

Arizona placed an open palm over her own eyes, "I missed you every day we didn't talk. I…know. I know you needed me as much as I needed you."

"More," Callie's eyes danced around the woman's face.

"But," the hand Arizona had over her eyes now went under the ones Callie had folded over her stomach. She spread her fingers wide over the brunette's expectant belly, "if it makes you feel any better…I'm pretty sure I love your baby more than Leah's."

Callie turned her head slightly and cupped Arizona's face with one hand; nearly getting lost in the blonde's freckles.

"Thank you," She whispered in a voice that sent shivers up the other woman's spine.

"For what?" Arizona blinked.

"Saying you love my baby,"

Arizona nodded and grasped the hand Callie had warming her face. Touching both her stomach and her hand, the blonde felt the need to pull the brunette in close; like a dance. But she wouldn't have to take the lead because the brunette rolled into her. With both of them now on their sides, nose-to-nose, Callie realized she could no longer resist. That's what she'd been doing after all, right? Since she'd first met her, this woman had been irresistible. This LL Bean Ad …with her honey-blonde mane and eyes like the ocean; a mouth that said her full name like nobody else…lips that if Callie could just tilt her head, might gently touch hers. And that they did.

—_You know that song? There's a part that's like "kissed you on the lips and opened your eyes"? Yes. You ever had one of those? The kind of kiss that opens your eyes? It's like a direct bolt of lightning shoots from the touch of her skin to the center of my chest. It's terrifying. It almost hurts…it definitely hurts. That pain that comes with ecstasy. But then my pulse slows, and I take in soft, delicate, bubble gum lips on mine. Calliope tastes like she looks. Passion fruit lip balm. Tart and so sweet. But this can't— _

… well not too gently…their lips pulled apart with a smack. And even though Arizona pressed in for a second pillowy soft peck— she immediately retracted and rolled onto her back again, folding her hands over her own stomach.

Callie stayed dreamily frozen just a little too long, involuntarily licking her lips…wanting more. But soon she too returned to her previous position.

They lay in still silence and let the blanket of stars and calm of the stream put them to sleep.

**A/N**

**'Daddy' is actually the name of the song that Arizona quotes during her inner monologue...but it also seemed pertinent to the chapter. **

** I wanted to personally thank you for your reviews. I love reading what you have to say, so if you're reading please please let me know what you think.**


	7. Anyone Else In The World

[Arizona's POV]  
It must've been the raindrops that woke me up; so cold on my face. I yawn and wonder how I could fall asleep here; how on these sticks and leaves and pebbles and bark and…Oh. My eyes wander and stumble upon the answer. Resembling the muse that is her namesake; Calliope lies next to me, glistening in her mist-covered skin. She is a fairytale. It should end here. I should need to walk away and never look back…pretend it never happened…any of it. But instead, all I need is to walk her home. She shouldn't be out here in this rain with the baby.

She sniffs roughly; waking up with my nudge, then her eyes spring open.  
"Hi," she says sweetly as she focuses on me. And with her looking up at me like this, I can't find a single reason to move.  
"Arizona, you're drenched! Did we...sleep here?"  
"Oh from the rain! Yes. That…is why I woke you up. We need to get you back home. You'll get yourself and the little one sick out here."  
She pops up with a wild smile and starts sprinting towards the house.  
"Callie No!"  
I can't stop thinking about the little person in her belly and the very slippery wet grass and even though she keeps looking back at me with a laugh, I'm terrified as I chase after her. My arms are stretched out in front of me, as if that'll help. She makes a perfect stop at her porch as I try to do the same and end up loosing my footing and sliding in beside her. She immediately breaks into a fit of laughter…she's also doing her best to help me up, but really she's useless when she laughs this hard.  
I'm just about to crack a smile, when a raspy voice from her porch steps asks,  
"You ok?"  
We both look up to find Mark's concerned frown staring back at us.  
"I'm fine." I growl, as I get myself up. Naturally, my tone does nothing to tip Mark off and he continues to speak to me,  
"I was actually on my way over to invite you guys to dinner—"  
"—We can't," I interrupt.  
"I didn't even tell you when."  
"Was it for tonight?"  
"…I don't…know?"  
"We can't.  
The screen door behind him opens and Ms. Stevens appears.  
"And why not?" She inquires, warily.  
"Oh…I…um." I stammer.  
"I insist." She says sternly.  
"We'll be there." Leah appears on our porch. "And thank you. I wanted to…apologize. I know you've called a few times..."  
Ms. Stevens smiles,  
"Water under the bridge. We've just been worried about you, Dear." She glances at me then back to Leah, "Are you…ok?"  
I quirk a brow…what exactly was _that_ supposed to mean?  
"Oh we're fine…" Leah looks to me, "Uh, come on in…Honey." It's said so awkwardly; she's never called me Honey…I almost want to laugh.  
"Ok then. We'll set up something soon…I just hope you can find your way over!" Ms. Stevens giggles to herself as she leads Mark inside and Callie trails behind. I follow Leah in, but for a split second Callie and I are the only ones outside and we glance at each other. She opens her mouth to say something, but then decides against it. I watch her make her way inside.

Leah's waiting for me in the kitchen.  
"You can not say no to that family."  
I take a minute and furrow my brow,  
"I think you're thinking of you…"  
"Arizona, I know I will forever be at your mercy based on my…transgressions…but that family is off limits, ok?"  
"Again…you're preachin to the choir here. I'm still pretty sure you're the one who—"  
"Arizona! 'Off limits' like, be on your best behavior, do you understand? No matter what …happened… with Mark, Ms. Stevens is like my second mom, ok? You can't say 'no' when she invites us to dinner."  
"Well _she_ didn't, _he_ did. And excuse me, but I'm pretty sure I can say no to whomever I damn well please…you can't forbid me from being upset with my wife's mistress's family." I hiss.  
Leah sighs and slumps her shoulders, "Look…please just. Don't…stay out all night again. If we're going to try and work this out…let's really try."  
I look at her. Her hands are resting on the counter; she's looking at them… discouraged; like I'm supposed to meet her half way.  
"Leah," I say softly.  
"Yeah?" She looks up with raised brows and a sad half smile.  
"Don't you _fucking_ make demands on me. Not now." I cut my eyes at her and leave the room.

* * *

The dinner came around so many months later that I completely forgot it'd even been planned. I'd just finished up a freelance photography project a few towns away, and had only seen Callie a few times in passing as I travelled back and forth.  
"Hi's" and "Bye's", you know. The ones loaded with so much more to say, but there's just no time…or place…or words, I guess.

Now that I'm here, at this table…I wish everyone else had forgotten too. It's terrible, for so many reasons. For one, Mark. He's being normal, creepy, and inappropriately flirtatious with both me and Leah. And I know he doesn't know…but it's times like this I want to tell him… His mom's too busy interrogating Leah to notice. She happens to be reason number two, by the way…for why this dinner is the worst…she abhors me. Something I'd failed to notice until tonight. She's always been ridiculously over protective of Leah, which I'd always seen, and even appreciated; but ever since that month that Leah and I …well…disappeared…I don't know, she seems to think I did something to her precious girl. Now that she knows that Leah's pregnant (via "donor"), I somehow became the enemy and can't get a God damn word in…not that I want to; Reason number three, Izzie, is getting enough words in for the six of us. So then there's reasons number four through infinity…my wife. What? She brought me here, she's having another person's baby, acting like nothing happened…etc. Apparently, I'm still not quite over a lot of this stuff; trying to take the high road is complicated.  
But absolutely. Completely. Worth it.  
Calliope is positively gorgeous. She's wearing an oversized powder blue summer dress with a sweetheart neckline, even though it's February. Her hair's in layered blackberry waves that I just need to run my fingers through. She's almost 3 months pregnant—by my count—and her belly bump is barely visible; but if you look for it... it is this cutest little thing.  
Of course, you'd only find it if you look really closely…or got past the plunging neckline and abundant cleavage…that may be the only thing I feast my eyes on at this table—which by the way they've fashioned with custom drawers on the bottom; it's actually quite efficient, plates and utensils are kept there. My guess though? Mark built it. You see these drawers will open on their own every once in a while. Callie's sitting at the end of the table while I'm on the corner next to her…so she notices when the drawers open…and closes them without thinking. The problem is, closing them requires her to spread and stretch out a long, naked, olive-toned leg by me to push the drawer in. Every once in a while, she'll even skim my jeans…and I'm telling you it drives me crazy. Between pretending to pay attention to the conversation, and trying to keep my eyes off Callie, I look up and realize I maybe haven't doing a great job of the latter. I'll tell you how I know; Callie suddenly catches my eye and mouths, _My tits look great, huh? _  
"What?!" I screech out loud, averting my eyes.  
"I said, my tits look great, huh?" She whispers, leaning in as everyone else stops talking.  
"Calliope Torres!" Ms. Stevens yelps.  
Callie shrugs.  
"What is going _on_ with you? You've been _all over the place_ lately and it's unacceptable. We have guests….you should…excuse yourself."  
"Pardon?" Callie side-eyes Ms. Stevens.  
"Ma, she's like 25 years old." Izzie ventured.  
"Well she's not acting like it. Callie I love you, but you will respect this house while you're in it. Go on."  
Callie widens her eyes and takes a deep incredulous breath, "Alright…?"  
She makes her way out of sight and into another room.  
And there goes my dinner. Well…the one I'd like to eat.

It's probably better that the rest of us end up on the back porch chatting it up about the old times while waiting for the sunset. It's the first time I've seen Leah really happy in a while. And even though I don't really have a place in the conversation, I smile along so she doesn't notice my extreme boredom. Ms. Stevens has even warmed back up a little and she's hooked her arm in mine; a small apology. It makes me feel like I don't want to tell her I have to get inside or I'll pee on myself. We've been out here a while, it's freezing, and she makes a mean fricken cider; I had about 4 cups with dinner. So rather than tell her any of this, I wait until I absolutely think I'll burst and fake a phone call-don't ask me why this is better than saying I gotta go...it's just one of those things. I walk normally until I'm out of their sight. At that point I start moving like I'm in an invisible potato sack. It's so bad I can't even spread my legs to walk.  
By the grace of God I make it.  
On my way back I notice a pair of legs crossed on top of an enormous recliner in the living room. I meant to turn the corner and head outside, but my own legs had other plans.  
Her back was to me, but she must've heard me coming, so she says,  
"You ok?"  
"Um…yeah?"  
"Your pee pee walk looks like Bill Cosby dancing. You ever seen him dance?"  
I erupt in laughter, "Oh my God! You saw that!"  
"Yeah" she joined. "But that had to be at least a two minute stream, so I understand."  
"You were listening!?" I continued cackling.  
"Are you kidding? It sounded like Niagara Falls in there. I could've heard that from your house."  
We keep laughing until we sigh out of it.  
My eyes scan the length of her. She's sitting up comfortably with her legs stretched out in front of her. The dress has carelessly risen up on the sides while also exposing more of her chest. I try and find a distraction and notice the book propped on top of her stomach.  
"What're you reading?" I say, noticing that came out rather lustily. Unlike her brother, Callie catches on immediately to my tone. Her eyes playfully search my face for a while before she slowly bites a lip and tilts her head,

"Come here," She pulls the lever to sit the lay-z-boy up right and scoots back to spread her legs.

I swallow hard. I can feel my pulse in my ears.

"Calliope, what are you doing?"

"Sit," she's placed the book on the ground and starts patting the space in between her legs.

"Wh-why?"

"Arizona," Her voice like honey, "You asked me what I'm reading, let me tell you the story."

The sun seems to be passing through this room as it sets; so most of it has a warm orange light, and the rest is shadows. With her reading lamp off, the light starts at Callie. She looks to me like a beacon…of what? I don't know. But I make my way and stand over her.

"The book's over there." I point to the floor next to her.

She smiles, looking up at me with her legs spread on either side of the chair and her arms on the arm rest. She knows I'm going to do what she wants. I lower myself between her legs, hesitating along the way, until my back has molded into her front. There's about an inch between us. Her hands are bringing my hair to one side of my neck, cascading it over my shoulder so that the other side is completely exposed.

I involuntarily lull my head to the side my hair is on, offering my exposed skin to her…she just laughs into it. The warmth has me closing my eyes to catch my breath.

"It's' about this girl." She whispers. "Who can't stop thinking about this other girl's lips." Her hands slide down to the small of my back, her lips tickling my neck. I shudder.

"Every single night, the girl goes to bed thinking about them. The softness, the taste, what it might be like to have them in her mouth…And do you know what she does?"

I lick my lips and whisper, "No," my throat is dry.

Her thumbs are hooked into the waistband of my jeans and circling around to the front.

"The girl puts her hand right here," She unbuckles my jeans and cups me over my underwear. "Mmm…lace," Callie smiles into my neck.

"Oh my God Calliope…" I whimper.

"You know you really shouldn't soak through such delicate material," She nips at me and continues. "Anyway, she imagines it's the other girl she's touching. She starts thinking about how the last time she saw the girl, she had to run home and make herself cum."

She's rubbing circles around my clit and my eyes roll back.

"Arizona?"

"Mmm?" I bite my lip.

"I come home dripping wet _every_ _time_ I'm around you." She starts licking and sucking my earlobe.

"Mm-Callie!"

"When_ever_ you call me Calliope…no matter what the context, do you know what happens?"

Her hand is speeding up. I can't get out any thing but tiny yelps as I get closer.

"Answer me or I'll stop." She hisses into the back of my neck.

"I _don't_," I whine slowly.

"No matter what…even if I'm mad at you…it sends a pulse straight to my pussy… I _always_ have a mini orgasm."

At the sound of her voice saying 'pussy', I unravel. Luckily she covers my mouth with her free hand—which up until that point was caressing my breasts—because it was loud. Many very loud moans gasped into the palm of her hand. All of them in the form of "Calliope".

The hand covering my mouth slides down my lips and cups one side of my jaw to turn my head for a kiss. It's hungry. She takes my lips and sucks them one by one. My tongue teases hers and I have to twist my body around and straddle her on my knees to really savor her mouth. She's taken her hand out of my pants and she pauses to suck on two fingers, that even in these new shadows, shine.

"Let me taste you, Calliope." I whisper. Her response, a small orgasm, is visible. The hand she was licking holds the other side of my jaw and she steadies my head to kiss me so hard I have to clutch her wrists to stay on top.

The screen door slams. And here I was forgetting there was anyone else in the world.

**A/N**

**Thank you so much for reading and following! Reviews are much appreciated :)**


	8. Seeing Red

[Callie's POV]

The next 3 minutes would define Arizona and me to this day.  
It's the reason I'm here...the reason she's not...but I'm getting ahead of myself.

My back was to the door, but kneeling over me, I'm sure Arizona had a perfect view of everyone gathered at the door making their way in from outside. Now technically, all they saw was what I can only describe as a crazy ass expression on Arizona's face, and the very top of the back of my head...and… yeah… I guess, my hands still on her face. Still, I thought about a few lies as a gut reaction...even though…there was no denying it was exactly what it looked like. Excuses didn't matter at this point anyway, both Ms. Stevens and Leah were heading towards us and before Arizona could move, she was being thrown off me. This is when my vision gets blurry. Ms Stevens is nose to nose with Arizona, who's more concerned with looking past her to see what Leah's doing to me. From where Arizona's lying, I'm sure she can only observe that the other blond is standing over me...she doesn't see the gritted her teeth, she-well she did see the balled fists… and I suppose it's why she said it.  
"Wait! No! Sh-SHE'S PREGNANT!" She screams desperately.  
I immediately break out in a cold sweat. You see, that's just how Arizona's always tried to explain it—all she saw was the fists and where Leah was standing ...a punch could've been thrown at any second, she'd whine. But I saw no danger…there wasn't any. Not yet.  
Everyone freezes.  
"What?" I hear Izzie whisper behind me.  
There are tears in my eyes and my perspiration has flashed to hot; because this not how it was supposed to happen. The betrayal boils my blood and I hear my voice echo through the room, "NO!" It's so shrill I don't even recognize it as my own.  
"Callie I—"  
"Just shut. Up." I say through my own gritted teeth. My jaw is clenched so hard, I'm sure I could shatter bone; and the temperature in my body has risen to a feverish degree. I'm so furious all I can think about is crying hot tears as I stand from the chair.  
"No—I— I thought she was going to hurt you!" Arizona eyes are shifting in a panic from me to Leah.  
"Not this bad she wasn't." I say lowly, then louder "Just leave Arizona. The only one I seem to need protection from is _you_." The last word comes out as snarl, straight from the pit of my stomach.  
"I'm sorry! It just- came out!" She's still on the floor and tears are starting to well at her eyes.  
"_Callie_, how _could_ you?" Ms. Stevens shakes her head disapprovingly, "Your father just passed away...you want to go risking your life and a baby's with the same thing he had? Has this taught you nothing?"  
"We're not even positive I have his condition," I interject.  
"So we're just not gonna talk about the fact that she's making out with a girl—"Izzie chimes in.  
"How far along are you?" Ms Stevens ignores her.  
"About as far as Leah, wouldn't you say Arizona?" I turn and lock eyes with Arizona, searing her with my hateful glare  
"Callie don't." I see Leah suddenly tighten up. But her voice is only a buzz in my throbbing mind. I'm seeing, feeling, and hearing red.  
"...Or should I ask Mark? He should know, right?" I turn to him.  
"What!?" Ms. Stevens is having a conniption.  
"Know what?" Mark is now uncharacteristically uneasy.  
"Don't you get it? That's your kid!" I point to Leah's stomach.  
"Callie!" Leah covers her face.  
"_Please_ Leah, he was bound to find out."  
"Callie, stop it! That's not my secret alone! You don't have to be an asshole!" Arizona finally stands.  
"I _do_ Arizona! Do you know _why_ I was keeping my baby a secret? Because these people will never forgive me if it doesn't survive. You've burdened me with not only my anxiety, but theirs too. They're going to ask me why I kept it...they're going to investigate Jackson…and really start asking why he's gone... You've turned my _fucking_ world upside down. And not the way you usually do - ruined my past _and_ my future... You know what that's like?" I'm hissing again "…it's like if I told Leah how you knew how she felt in high school and couldn't fucking care less. How you're not at all star-crossed. How this isn't your happily ever after. _That's_ what it's like."  
"You fucking bitch." Arizona let the angry tears stream down her chin.  
Leah looked around lost and started to leave.  
"Wait, Leah. I-I knew we weren't a mistake." Mark stutters nervously.  
"What?!" Arizona's head juts out through the tears, "you knew?"  
"...After she started asking me all those questions...I went over to apologize one day so mom would get off my back, and then it all came back to me…we'd had se—" Mark glanced at his mother "we uh...we had engaged in intercourse…But by the time I realized that's what she was yelling at me about…we were…you know…doing it again. But I had NO IDEA the kid was—"  
"MARK!" Ms Stevens' hands clasp the cross on her neck.  
"Leah! What the fuck!" Arizona throws up her arms.  
"We've been sneaking around ever since," Mark started walking towards Leah.  
Suddenly—and it happened so quickly, I didn't even really see it; mind you, I was looking right at them— Arizona swung at Mark and knocked him unconscious. He hit the floor like dead weight. Out. Cold.  
Even Arizona looked surprised. She held her fist with wide eyes, looking around to see if anyone else could explain what she just did. A pang of jealousy stripes down my belly.  
"I—I'm sorry I…I guess she's still my wife…" She mumbled.  
Leah suddenly furrowed her brow…as if something just hit _her_,  
"Guess a-fucking-gain Arizona. You seem to be interested in someone else entirely—" She gestured to me as she kneeled down to tend to Mark.  
"You can _not_ equate this to that! This is the first time—" Arizona starts.  
"Arizona! This is not the first time! You guys spend hours on the porch…and nights in the woods for Christ sake!"  
"Nights in the woods Callie?!" Ms. Stevens and Izzie snap their heads towards me.  
"_What?! _What do you want!? Yes! She was the only person who knew I was pregnant who didn't run away…I never had to explain anything to her...it's just so…_easy_. And there's nothing wrong with having a..." I look to Arizona, and even though I hate her right now I…  
"Please Callie, don't say 'friend'. We all know that's a lie." Leah crosses her arms, getting back to her feet as Mark grumbles into consciousness.  
Izzie was strangely calm in her tone as she came closer, "You should know you don't have to touch someone physically to cheat. If you'd rather spend more time with each other than—"  
"—And what about when you _do_ physically touch, hmm?" Arizona turned to her wife and continued, "Over and over again…What was the plan Leah? How long were you going to keep this up? …Bullshitting me about_ '_really _trying_ to work it out_'… _"  
"Do you know what it's like to see exactly what you've always wanted with your wife just…blossom immediately with someone you considered a sister?" Leah confesses lowly. "It hurts, Arizona. When I watch you two together, I feel like I'm… intruding. You think I don't hear you on the porch? Laughing like you never have with me? I _want_ that with you. I'm never going to _have_ that…with you."

"Did it ever occur to you that they just hit it off as friends?" Izzie crosses her arms now.

"…Best friends who just happened to fall in love, yes. The part of me that wasn't dying inside even thought it was sweet. I got lonely, so I started talking to Mark…and the more time I spent with him, the better he made me feel…the more I realized—_this _is how it's supposed to go…I…love him. And I didn't want to tell him about the baby yet because…I don't want to scare him off…"

Everyone but Mark rolls their eyes. He responds with a dopey smile as he sits up.

Arizona responds, "What happened tonight…wasn't…something I initiated—" I feel my body flash to hot again…It's unclear if I'm embarrassed or turned on at the memory of what must've occurred not more than 30 minutes ago—"and I'm sorry for that. But I'd like to make it clear that _you_ are the reason this marriage is over. Not me. I really _was_ trying to do the honorable thing…despite how I feel…about…that's just something I can't help…"

She looks at me with these eyes. They break my heart. They're saying she wishes it were something she _could_ help …because she doesn't want to feel any way about me right now. It makes me want to hug her and hurt her…because I know that feeling.

"And what about you, Calliope?"

Ooof. When Ms. Stevens says it…it certainly does _not_ do what Arizona's does to me.

"What _about_ me?" My defensiveness is palpable.

"You're gay now?" Izzie lifts a brow.

I look to everyone else. All these faces waiting for answers I didn't have…or didn't care to flesh out in public.

"I…"

"Jesus Callie! You're bleeding." Arizona screeches.

Well that's the last thing I heard before that blurry vision I'd been having became tunnel vision. And the last thing I see? My dress flying over my legs, a dark patch parachuting onto my blood-stained thighs.

**A/N**

**Thank you all so much for your hilarious comments. I find myself laughing out loud when reading them. Keep 'em coming. I'll answer questions...but only if they don't spoil what's to come :)**


	9. Nothing To Do But Fall In Love With You

**[Callie's POV]**  
_I don't care if this is where you're actually from because it's where we are now._

_They say I must be from this town, Rhodes, and you from Thessaloniki because of my dark features and your light ones. No matter the theory, we both belong here; on this island made up of islands. These sweltering summer nights are spent downtown where there are endless rows of clubs for tourists...a group we're no longer a part of. At this point, we go there so often we're beloved by all the other regulars. They buy us flaming shots of absynth. (We're still waiting for the supposed hallucinations to take place); Go so often we've memorized the DJ's playlists and have choreographed every single song. Go so often, we've been asked to man the bar and lock up at the end of the night, and are lovingly received when we do so. _

_Afterward, we take the bus home. The bus, in this small town, is of course nothing more than a van. But again, it's the same people every night. So when you beg the driver to stop so you can pee in a vast field, I don't have the heart to tell you that you chose the one spot lit by a lamppost - probably because it was the one place you could actually see - and everyone saw everything. We're somewhat of a celebrated celebrity couple here, so when you're greeted with laughter and clapping upon your return, you think nothing of it.  
We get out and make our way down deserted streets to an ally where we know we'll find a huge, sweaty, shirtless man making souvlaki. It's 4 in the morning, but he'll be there. There are other places, maybe with waiters and clothed chefs, but that's not us. That's not our life. We lean into each other and wait in the light of his grill, giggling about tonight. You touch my face for a second, just when I was getting ready to tell you how beautiful you are and kiss you._

_Days are spent waking up to your naked back. I'm convinced it is the single sexiest thing I will ever lay eyes on. And all you have to do is sleep. Most of the time you do it out of necessity, temperatures reach 100 degrees over here. But that's actually the best part. You don't even think about what it does to me...running my eyes over the freckles on our shoulder blades before you wake up…when you do, I've already gone back to sleep. But you slither over me and just lay there. Directly on top of me, mirroring my pose, breathing into the back of my neck. Sometimes you kiss me awake. Sometimes you just start moving…and you tell me not to say a word…so I don't._

_You keep kissing into the back of my hair, my neck…while your hands move from on top of mine over to my arms. Suddenly, you start thrusting…really gently. Just enough to make me drool for more…or even wonder if I'm imagining it. It's so good. You're panting a little bit into my ear. I want to thank you. I can't understand a word of what you're saying, but thank you so much... Mmph but a little harder please. But you don't. You continue, nice and slow. As hot as it is; our body heat, the temperature of this room… I'm in a daze; mumbling into the pillow. You whisper to turn around, so I do. You're kneeling over me. I forgot your top was off and now seeing your naked breasts up close, I can't help but to lick my lips; you tell me to do it again and bite your lip and watch me obey. You're pulling of my shirt and kissing every piece of skin that starts to show itself. Your lips are both soft and sticky. And the sound of them on my skin makes me quiver…your hands are all over my body…sometimes squeezing a little…but I have to grab your head and pull you into my mouth. I take your lips in mine, taste your tongue, eat up your delicious lips. Ugh those lips. I'm gong to take your panties off with my teeth. I'm going lick every single inch of your skin…but not before you get to me first. You tell me you're hungry…. Hearing a growl coming out of your pretty mouth makes me want to help you rip my clothes off. I beg you... I am begging you to fuck me. You promise you will. You promise all the way down my stomach and into my core. You're still saying it as I clench around your tongue and... do you know what you do? You stop. And you look me in the eye as you softly smack my throbbing nub over and over. I think I'm going to pass out. I do. And I wake up to you watching me catch my breath. I thought I'd be able to return the favor, but you just shake your head as you go back down to clean me up. I want to beg you to be careful because I'm so sensitive I'm still trembling. But I can't…I don't have the words. Don't need them. You know exactly what to do._

_Later, we walk aimlessly down the street and I playfully grab your phone as you try to map out the next acropolis we're going to conquer. That day you'll whine 'babe' while trying to snatch it back. You'll think it's annoying enough to unhinge me; get me to give it back. But it will have me falling apart in a completely different way. The way you do when you're complete; realize you're the other half of something. And the other half of me you see , Arizona, would be you. I don't know why that's my definition of being loved, but it is. Hold my hand, and I think I'll stay here a while._

* * *

**[Arizona's POV]**  
Callie can't stay here much longer.

Technically?

She's been dead 4 months.

I alone have kept her on life support. Do you know how hard that is to do when you're not a family member and those who are related want nothing to do with you or the patient? Damn near impossible. Every week I've had to make a plea to keep her alive to some relative close enough to sign documents at the hospital; a relative who always needs to be convinced. This relative, no matter which one, will always tell me something I didn't know about her heart problem…about how selfish she is…about how much blood she lost because of it…In the process I've gotten to see why Callie was so mad. She knew this would happen. They've got nothing but bad things to say; statistics about the odds of her having the disease and such. I don't know if I want to roll my eyes or hide.

No one wants to hold the baby. She's so little... beautiful like her mommy. So I do it. I hold this little miracle that shouldn't have survived. I tell her all about how her mommy's going to wake up...wiith tears in my eyes. Because I'm lying.

I'll sing to her. To them both...my voice will crack, but every single word is for these girls. And it's the only way I know how to calm us all:

_Into this strange elastic world_  
_ Pontus kindly gave up a pearl_  
_ Of his eternal stone and mud_  
_ Ain't she lovely bone and blood_

_Born of the sea_  
_ A thousand miles away from me_  
_ A court of angels, a ward of the sun_  
_ A future forming, a curse undone_

_Under our softly burning lamp she_  
_ Takes her time_  
_ Telling stories of our possible lives_  
_ And love is the ink in the well when her body writes_

_I've been selfish and full of pride_  
_ She knows deep down there's a little child_  
_ But I've got a good side to me as well_  
_ And it's that she loves in spite of everything else_

_A song in the tree has distracted her mind_  
_ Some other curious form of life_  
_ Has made its presence to her known_  
_ And she coos so gently, soft and low_

_...__Its not that the darkness can't touch our lives_  
_ I know it will in time, but she's no ordinary valentine_  
_ And know when the sun goes down she sheds a darling light_

At the end, I whisper that they're threatening me with for more days of life with her. Rather of life _for_ her.

"I've run out of relatives, Callie. So I guess what I'm-I'm asking is ... can you just...can you live? Can you live. For me?"

* * *

**A/N: Thank you guys so much for being patient and I'm sorry such a short chapter took so long, but many life happenings (summer) prevented me from buckling down.**_  
_


	10. The Story

Arizona's POV

"I h-" I look up to find her taking a deep breath, "-heard you singing and I—"  
She coughs and starts choking on the tube running the length of her throat.  
I hear a voice cry out for a nurse. It's my own. It's desperate, so I don't recognize the tone, but as I run to the nurse's station and continue shrieking until someone sprints back to the room with me; I realize it was me. _It's hard to recognize myself when wrapped up in somebody else, _I find myself thinking as I watch nurses remove the tube so the woman I've found myself wrapped in can breath on her own. The nurses run out to get the doctor when they're done. A look of happy bewilderment plastered across their faces as they do so. The hospital had been rooting for Callie, but with just 41 minutes until the plug was to be pulled...they'd pretty much lost all hope. Not me though. I mean I wasn't any less baffled on the outside. But my prayers were much more confident: "You wouldn't do this to me," I'd say, " Give me this love and take it away the moment I'm complete. So even if I'm the only one, I know she's going to live". I did know. I knew so well it scared me.  
Callie's eyes were red. Her lips cracked, hair matted-though in the course of her time spent in the room, I had braided it many times. The woman had quite literally come back from the dead and all I could do was stare. The doctor had just given a "cautiously optimistic" lecture, so Callie was stuck in a stare as well.  
"It wasn't real..." She had been muttering.  
"No," I said quietly.  
"...But it was so beautiful."  
I looked up, so she continued,  
"We... were so beautiful. We just…left it all behind. God Arizona...now I have this splitting headache, my body feels like someone else's painful mass of flesh...you should've just..." She trailed off as I got up and left the room. Callie turned to the window.  
"Callie?" I ventured, re-entering the room, walking into her line of sight and holding out what was in my arms, "Was she there?"  
"Oh my God!" Calle gasped at the bundle in the my arms. "Oh my God my baby!"  
I smiled with tears welling in my eyes.  
Callie sat up for the first time...I didn't even know she could.  
"I don't know how to..." She said attempting position herself correctly.  
"Just fold your arms like mine and support her neck."  
I placed the baby in Callie's arms and said, "She's easy you know. Just a sweet little girl,"  
"Beautiful" Callie gasped, tears streaming down her face and on to the baby's blanket.  
Suddenly she looked up at me, "What's her name"  
I shrugged, thinking it was kind of funny that she'd ask me, "I don't know mommy. You tell me."  
Callie smiled and for the first time she looked like herself. That big beautiful smile that melted any living soul.  
"What've you been calling her?" She continued.  
"Umm...Babygirl, Sweetie, Mama's little-"  
Callie smile got impossibly wider, "-Mama?"  
I blushed and scratched my head, "I mean you mama not me mama."  
"Sure," Callie smirked. "You've been her mama for - how long did the doctor say? Going on 4 months?"  
I shrugged with a smile; embarrassed.  
"It counts," Callie smiled back.  
"Your brother and Gabby eloped."  
"Back to calling her Gabby huh?"  
I nod, "That bad."  
"Where in the hell did Mark take her?!"  
"Back to LA to raise their "family."'  
"Wow,"

I could see Callie thinking about that. Family. She looked around the room and at the baby in her arms. I follow her gaze and caught on to the train of thought.  
"They come sometimes. Your mom's coming as soon as she can catch a flight. No one on your dad's side had her number so...it was really hard to get a hold of her, but she would've been here if she'd've known."  
Callie nodded.  
"Flights are booked solid from Florida...but she's going to the airport every day to see if she can get on stand by."  
"When she gets here, you better scram."  
"Ha, scram? Why?"  
"Four months of me dead and she's just finding out now? She's gonna need someone to be pissed at. And I can assure you, you don't want it to be you,"  
I rolled my eyes.  
"I'm serious" Callie didn't blink.  
But I smile, too elated to care. I still can't believe what I'm looking at: Callie holding the baby. I sigh and looked down at the little girl . "Look at those eyes. You know, she never cries. She's always just observing her surroundings, like she knows what she's looking at. Not just smart, y'know? Wise."  
Callie smiled down at her daughter.  
Realizing I hadn't yet left them alone, I excuse myself to speak to the doctor. When we were done, we walked together back to the room to find the baby asleep in her carrier and Callie sitting on the edge of the bed trying to get up.  
"Callie no!" I run to her side.  
"Ms. Torres," the doctor warns, holding Callie's arm "You need extensive physical therapy before you can do that."  
"What?" Callie pushed herself slowly to her feet "This?" She took slow, shaky steps. Dr. Altman's hand flew to her mouth and it was everything she could do to contain a gasp.  
"Now listen up," Callie continued to walk to the door, past me as I beam at her. "If my tests come back all clear, I'm out of here by tonight." She held on to the door frame and steadied herself for a turn around.  
Both myself and Dr. Altman protested vehemently, but we both knew it was of no use. The woman would do what she wanted. And the tiny squeal I involuntarily emitted upon confirmation of her discharge revealed I wasn't completely against the idea either.

The entire hospital staff sent us off. Callie in a wheelchair pushed by me with the baby in a carrier on her lap.  
"Bye Sofia!" One nurse after the other waved as they passed.  
"Sofia?" I looked down

"It means wise in Greek." Callie said matter-of –factly.

"I know…I just didn't…" I find myself trailing off.

From the back of her head, I can tell Callie's smiling into her daughter's face.

A few weeks pass and there's still no sign of Callie's mom. I constantly dread that call because this house…our house…is fucking perfect. A fairytale. A story book. A family life I didn't even know I wanted. It's absolutely nothing like the one I once shared with Leah. I mean physically the house is the same. But you'd never recognize us. Parents. We kind of skipped the whole part where we talk about what _we_ are…it doesn't matter. Because this happens:

I walk by an open door and inside I see her. Facing a window and lulling Sofia to sleep. She has the most beautiful voice. The sun is setting and as I watch her tap the baby's rocker gently, I sigh. I have never been happier, more stable, or less like what I ever thought I would turn out to be. And it's refreshing…you know, not being the mess I just knew I'd turn out to be. This version of me is the best I've ever seen. The one who knows what she wants, who she wants. Callie's spotted me at the door and she waves me in; continuing to sing. She motions for me to come over, sit on her lap. So I do. Squeeze between the rocker and her body…God and she wraps her arms so tightly round my waist. I wasn't expecting to feel her need. I don't know how to tell her it's ok. So I start as far back as I can and trail my hands up the arms wrapped around me to mirror their position… holding her there. She sang into the back of my neck,

"_You see the smile that's on my mouth  
It's hiding the words that don't come out  
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed  
They don't know my head is a mess  
No, they don't know who I really am  
And they don't know what I've been through like you do  
And I was made for you..."_

Soon her face was between my shoulder blades. She inhaled deeply and I swear to God I've never felt so intensely needed. Not wanted. Needed. Like I was a part of her she couldn't be without. I'd like to say it wasn't sexual…but everything this woman does makes me wet…what I _will_ say is that it was so much more than that. It was…

"I love you," she muttered into my spine.

I'm pretty sure we turned on our sides and fell asleep like that. Curled into each other.


End file.
